Taking it to the extreme

Channel Hopping

LIKE him or loathe him, the most talked-about man in Britain’s hour-long slot on the BBC is beginning to rankle.

It wasn’t even as if the shifty so-and-so was interested in question time — buttering up anyone who’ll listen is more his thing.

Yes, “Friday Night With Jonathan Ross” really is going downhill.

There’s always an element of plugging on any chat show — whether the guests have an imminent new book, DVD or latest single — but this takes it to the extreme. There’s rarely a sentence which doesn’t end in “I’m a huge fan.”

Rapper 50 Cent —– whom Ross has promised us since episode one — didn’t turn up. So our man in the hot seat drafted in two-bit comedian Tim Minchin . . . some Russell Brand look-alike with more make-up. Instead of a headliner, we got eyeliner.

Brand obviously had his phone switched off . . . as did Gervais and the rest of the Ross A-list flunkies.

All out of small talk, the darling of the BBC literally had his pants pulled down by said little-known comic. A new low.


ON the other side, watching John and Edward was like being at a Butlins cabaret night on “The X Factor” — with yellow and red coats. Chalk and cheese have been more in-synch.

There were more hairstyles from Dannii — her crimper will be packing up the scissors and retiring to Oz by Christmas at this rate.

But it was Miss Frank who got the cut. The fat rapper in the middle (Miss Frank Spencer) was breaking out of her slacks like the Incredible Hulk. Some mothas do ’ave em.

Taggart starred in “Coronation Street”, under the guise of Tony Gordon. Or was it The Hitman and Her? The executioner said “muurtder” nearly as many times as he’s tried committing it. Factory rival Luke Strong woke up smelling of Rosie and did a bunk with her 90 grand. Real underworld stuff.

BENIDORM continues to amuse. We had squits, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll karaoke. A little ray of sunshine now the clocks have gone back.

Soap roar: Joe’s boat on “Coronation Street”. An about-turn to see him smile.

SOAP BORE: Darren Miller the father of George? Now that’s stretching it a bit, even for Hev.