Pav’s Patch; I’ll tweet, but I refuse to be poked

ARE you into any of these weird and wonderful internet sites, like Facebook? Several people have suggested to me that I go on Facebook, but who on earth would be interested in where I went to on holiday?

In fact, I couldn’t post anything as I never take pictures on holiday. Years ago, I realised that after the first week home I’d throw the photos in a draw and never look at them.

So I stopped taking them, same as I never send postcards. Once again, I realised no one cared whether they got one or not.

This year, I’m even going to give up sending Christmas cards and see if anyone mentions it. I mean, what is the point of sending the things? Will anyone really miss them? I’m going to keep the money for myself.

While I don’t feel the need to share my life on Facebook (and be poked by people wanting to be my “friend”), I have registered for Twitter, a truly ridiculous site. You can tell people what you are doing but only in bitesize chunks of 140 characters or less.

People who send you messages are said to be tweeting you, and I’ve been tweeted by a guy at Tameside Radio and my nephew. It all sounds just a bit seedy if you ask me.

I have to confess, I only fire off abuse in my very occasional postings. I often ask why people are so sad that they want to view the nonsense I write? Who cares?

But one site I do like is YouTube. The other night, it allowed me to reacquaint myself with the utterly gorgeous Clodagh Rogers. You really should look at her singing “Jack in a Box” at the 1971 Eurovision Song Contest.

I’ve also had a peek at Freddie and the Dreamers leaping about the stage. What a mob they were. I suppose they were all in their 20s but in the clips they look like they were in their 50s. Especially Pete Birrell who went on to star with Freddie in “Little Big Time”. Remember Oliver the Clock?

It was also good to take a look at the Barron Knights. I’d forgotten about them until Duke D’Mond died recently. And he wasn’t called Duke D’Mond, he was really called Richard Palmer.

How come we don’t get bands doing impressions any longer? Whatever happened to the Rockin’ Berries and “Rock n’Roll Nursery Rhyme” with a version of “Higgledy Piggledy My Black Hen” supposedly done by Bryan Ferry.

Going off at a complete tangent, did anyone actually buy novelty singles like that? Does anyone have a copy of “Snooker Loopy” or “Shaddap You Face” and still play it?